Lately I've felt like I have nothing to say, nothing to share. I have felt empty where I always used to find the comfort of words. I'm not sure why I have had this struggle lately. Perhaps my priorities have been skewed, perhaps my wellbeing has fallen to the bottom of the list. Mostly, I think I have felt irrelevant, hopeless.
It's hard to put art at the top of your priorities when life is handing you a million other things to handle that seem so urgent, so practical. It's hard to put yourself first when you have a home to clean, food to put on the table, countless jobs to do.
I have been struggling lately... Until today. Today I have something to say. Today I read, perhaps a little late, that Joey Feek was released from her pain and sent to heaven. Rory's words have touched me through every post he has made throughout his journey, and his most recent post had me in a pool of tears. It felt like my heart had been split in half.
Of course I did not know Joey but her story, her sweet sweet story, brought me to my knees. I am beyond blessed. I have so many things to share with the world, just as Joey did her whole life. My life is so precious. My loved ones are so unbelievably precious. This life is the most incredible adventure one could ever embark on.
So I need to embrace it. I need to embark on my adventure. I need to remember that life is temporary and oh so fragile. I need to breathe the love in, and send the love right back out. I need to be whole in this experience that is so fleeting. Whether I live an extraordinary life is up to me.
I need to live as Joey lived, touching people's hearts in the most honest way. I need to live as Indy lives, free and spirited and joyful. I need to live as Rory lives, honest and loving and kind.
Rest in peace, beautiful Joey. You are, and always have been the most beautiful angel.
Take care of yourselves, lovelies.